Moving

The entire time that I was a kid in Northern Minnesota (1969-1979, ages 7 through 17), my father made no bones about the fact that he disliked where we lived and wanted to transfer somewhere else. He would often talk about seeking that transfer and when topics concerning the future were discussed he would often interject that "we might be gone by then..." .

Yet that town was my childhood home and those friends were the only friends I had known. 11 years of thinking that we were going to be leaving at any time took a toll during these important formative years that I can't fully explain even now. I just remember the fear.

I do know that the insecurity of pending removal made me more open to people superficially and yet less able to completely and deeply open to friendships (while perversely increasing my longing for that very deep friendship.)

But maybe that's just psycho-babble. (I know that when I stare too deeply into my own navel about issues like this, I end up getting lost from what's important today.)

But today I was pondering why I'm accepting very poor treatment in several areas of my life and trying to sort out how much of it is following Jesus' instruction to "turn the other cheek" or whether it might not, instead, reflect a deeper personal weakness. And while considering this, I came across Amy's "Todays Thought" posting about moving, which in turn inspired these memories.

All I know is that I can only be close to God and follow Him today. There's nothing I can do to make me more spiritual in the past and I cannot make tomorrow's choices to turn to Him while it is still today. Therefore...

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

Philippians 4:11-13